Superman

September 22, 2012

Superman enters the room trying not to let show that he is somewhat insulted that they are forcing him to do this. But he is not nervous. He will show them that he was right. He will convince them of his righteousness.
 
— Good morning. Thank you for coming and giving me the opportunity to explain myself. I will answer now whatever questions you might have.
 
There is a moment of silence, but finally there is a journalist who dares to ask the obvious.
 
— Well, you beat up a cop. Why did you… do that?
 
— He was corrupt.
 
Superman follows his shocking statement with a close description of the heights that the moral perversion of the cop had arrived. How rapist and murderers had been let go free. The description is stomach-turningly detailed. At the end of it, silence fills the room again.
 
— Ok, that seems, well, he was clearly horrible.
 
Some chattering follows. The journalists still have questions. Maybe he should have followed a certain procedure, but if this was the only, the quickest, way of stopping this cop, then his actions were not so bad.
 
Superman is content with the reaction. Sure they quibble a little bit, but that is what journalists do. But, as it seems that the conference will soon come to an end, a voice can be loudly heard from the back of the room.
 
— Why didn’t you tell us before?
 
The chattering quiets down somewhat.
 
— Well, something had to be done.
 
— About what? Don’t you think, that if a corrupt cop is found that there may be deeper problems that just that one cop being corrupt.
 
— Still, something had to be done.
 
— By you? Without us, the general population.
 
— I did it for you.
 
— Superman, you are an asshole.

On the Nature of Words

February 10, 2011

Marketing blub for photo-sharing program instagram containing the word 'quirky'.

Whoever put the word quirky there is a genius and should probably be summarily executed.